Blankets

When you were a child, did you ever have a blanket, a baby doll, or anything else that specifically brought you comfort?
For me, it was my Momma and Daddy singing to me, or my Granny’s love.

I ask this question because something very profound was shared with me this morning. Something that helps me to know and understand myself and how to set boundaries in my life.

Lets begin with the confession that I don’t have everything together. I don’t have all of the answers. The revelation I have today will not look the same to me in 5 years.
Life done right should be that way. We should always be growing, learning, and changing.

I wonder how it could be possible that Most of the time I feel so empty and lonely, especially since I have wonderful people in my life.

I had no clue how such emptiness could be inside me until this morning. 

Someone asked me, “Who, or what is your comfort blanket?  What things do you allow in your life that you find temporary solice in, and who have you become a blanket to?”

These temporary sources of comfort and addictive pleasures keep us trapped in a cycle of wishing and daydreaming, keeping us far from dealing with true realities. As a result, we never do the hard work of finding and developing real healing solutions.

As I was considering my emptiness, I began assessing snd comparing that to the giving of myself as someone else’s “blanket”.   I began to see how I have placed my affections and my focus on sources that were never created to bring fulfillment or personal contentment.

A blanket can keep you warm but IT CANNOT LOVE YOU. 

I have lent myself out to be a blanket, while getting nothing in return. 

I have been LOVING A “BLANKET”WHO CANNOT GIVE ME WHAT I TRULY NEED. 

This is how you know if you are in healthy a relationship or have not set the proper boundaries. At the end of the day, you are what THEY  need, but they are not what YOU need. A very codependent bond to these temporary vices or people can do nothing else except create a lonely, dark space.

Why do we allow these substitutions in our lives? 

Why do I allow myself to be used over and over again for miniscule moments of relief? 

How can I realistically expect something, or someone, to bring me contentment and lasting joy when it is incapable of fulfilling me in any real measure. Blankets cannot possibly ever do it!

The misery of these choices have left me feeling like I am nothing at times, draining away my self-respect and constantly eating away at my confidence. 

A blanket cannot love me. 

A blanket cannot give me anything lasting, fulfilling, and real.

I let the deceitful warmth of these temporary vices lure me, dooming me to continually repeat distructive cycles. There are no suretys, saftey, love, peace, joy and longevity in deceitfully delicious deceptions. Breaking addiction to anything is hard work. I pray for the fortitude and courage to face my inner foes. I am exhausted from the emotional, spiritual, and physical roller-coasters of blankets.
My relationships with these fuzzy psychos is over. I need what is true, beautiful, healthy, and lasting. 

So long and farewell to these soul-suckers!

Yours, Jenny